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[原創作品] 不要對她說

今晚,她又上來他家了。
站在他家門口時,她的臉上,兩行淚痕若隱若現。她剛哭過。
[我可以在這裡睡一晚嗎?]她說。他微笑地點頭。
洗個澡後,她向他借了一件短袖衫。她穿起後,平平無奇的衣服,搖身一變,成為一件性感的睡裙。
她睡了。他的母親剛才走過來,小聲的問他,她不是有男朋友嗎?怎麼會上來?
他沒有回答。他不是沒有答案;而是,他不需要答案。
他凝望著她的背影。她的長髮,是那麼的輕逸,柔柔的鋪在軟枕邊、床上,一縷青絲幽幽的散發著芳香。
不敢打擾她,他甚至拿一張椅子放在床邊,坐著,生怕自己的重量壓在床上會影響她。這一刻,可以望到她的背影,就已足夠。
他忘了她的移情別戀——因為,他和她從沒戀過。一直,只有他在暗處靜靜望著她,一直,就只像現在一樣,只望著她的背影。當她主動走來,問他拿功課來抄,他滿心欣喜,甚至有數晚睡不著。當她拖著別的男人的手,他沒有妒忌、憤怒,只有祝褔。
他是那種[沒有殺傷力]的男生;沒有女生會注意、在意他,不過,這反而令女生更放心跟他交往。所以今晚,她上來了。
他甚至沒有問她,是不是跟男友鬧翻了。他知道,她拖過好幾個男人的手;然而,他沒有做下一個的預備。因為,這種距離,就足夠了。
是自卑嗎?是自我欺騙嗎?不曉得。總之,這種距離,就足夠。
他一直只想,讓一切停留在幻想的國度;她是那個夢幻般絢麗的肥皂泡,在幻想的國度中輕輕的飄,折射出七彩斑爛的光芒;光芒照耀著他的生命,令他的生命充滿喜悅。他只怕,如果有一天,他忍不住接近她,只會戳破這肥皂泡;他的世界,從此變得一片黑暗。
所以,他一直只想保留這個距離。一直這樣,就好了。
只是,今晚不同。也許,是她的光芒太誘人;也許,是幻想的國度崩潰了,一時間想要衝出現實。驀然,他感到,他不想再只有遙望的份兒;他更想輕輕的觸碰一下,這個七彩斑爛的肥皂泡。
他默默地,往她的臉上輕輕一吻。
這樣就好了。就只是這一吻,如此而已。
他輕輕的站起來,步出房間,輕輕的關上房門。今晚要睡沙發呢,他心想。
只是,他很滿足。因為,他是曾經跟這個夢,如此接近過。他只祈求上蒼,不要對她說,他曾經吻過她。
不要對她說。就讓一切返回幻想的國度裡去吧。
不要對她說。
Alessa is a daughter of Dahlia Gillespie. Alessa gets toasted in a ritual. Alessa is in agony. Alessa sends a part of her soul (the pure part, the part that wouldn't have to suffer) away in a form of a baby abandoned on the road. Harry finds the baby with his wife. They name her Cheryl.

The rest of it... You know.

回復 #2 龍井樹 的帖子

隨便轉載、改編,只要你quote返我個名,話個靈感係黎自我呢篇野就得。
Alessa is a daughter of Dahlia Gillespie. Alessa gets toasted in a ritual. Alessa is in agony. Alessa sends a part of her soul (the pure part, the part that wouldn't have to suffer) away in a form of a baby abandoned on the road. Harry finds the baby with his wife. They name her Cheryl.

The rest of it... You know.

回復 #4 龍井樹 的帖子

[我沒有回答。反正她已經來了,其他東西都再沒關係。]這一句,可改為[我沒有回答。反正她來了;一切也再沒關係。]這樣看上去會較為簡潔,也更有感染力。
不過,為什麼開頭明明是[我],之後卻變了[那個人]?小心,小心。
很不錯呢。你令我有教你寫作的衝動;如果你不介意,我願意免費教你。
Alessa is a daughter of Dahlia Gillespie. Alessa gets toasted in a ritual. Alessa is in agony. Alessa sends a part of her soul (the pure part, the part that wouldn't have to suffer) away in a form of a baby abandoned on the road. Harry finds the baby with his wife. They name her Cheryl.

The rest of it... You know.

回復 #6 Step.King 的帖子

沒錯呢........我就是將這首歌的意境,具體地改編成一個故事。
Alessa is a daughter of Dahlia Gillespie. Alessa gets toasted in a ritual. Alessa is in agony. Alessa sends a part of her soul (the pure part, the part that wouldn't have to suffer) away in a form of a baby abandoned on the road. Harry finds the baby with his wife. They name her Cheryl.

The rest of it... You know.

回復 #8 Paul_Bard 的帖子

你也不妨試試呀!你也是愛歌之人,不妨也從這方面培養一下興趣,提升寫作功力。先慕後臨,總比先臨後慕容易得多。
我就是希望大家像我一樣,不斷地為寫好自己的文章、小說而努力;這樣總比不斷做[頂心杉]更好。
Alessa is a daughter of Dahlia Gillespie. Alessa gets toasted in a ritual. Alessa is in agony. Alessa sends a part of her soul (the pure part, the part that wouldn't have to suffer) away in a form of a baby abandoned on the road. Harry finds the baby with his wife. They name her Cheryl.

The rest of it... You know.

回復 #10 Paul_Bard 的帖子

嗯........中英夾雜最困難的地方,就是英文那部份,未必每個人都會有共鳴。我在[那一年夏天,那一場戀愛]入面引用Debussy的鋼琴樂章就是一個例子:我只會在這情況用英文引用,因為看的人只需到唱片店找這首樂章,甚至在網上找尋、下載,很快就可以對我這篇文章有共鳴了。
而且,當中有很強烈的故事、時空背景;如果要寫這種題材,個人認為不一定要表明是哪一族對付哪一派的人,可以單靠場景的氣氛、人物唱著歌謠時歌詞的內容引人追看下去。換句話說,即是淡化時代、人物背景,反而用故事內容、人物間的角色衝突去突顯故事主題,這樣會更合適。
對不起,一切只是個人意見,希望你不介意。
Alessa is a daughter of Dahlia Gillespie. Alessa gets toasted in a ritual. Alessa is in agony. Alessa sends a part of her soul (the pure part, the part that wouldn't have to suffer) away in a form of a baby abandoned on the road. Harry finds the baby with his wife. They name her Cheryl.

The rest of it... You know.
原帖由 抽刀斷水 於 2007-8-8 20:01 發表

Paul少的文章,真教人感動。

假如Paul少能在本人的虐打下唱首聖詩給我聽,我都可能會信主。
Paul少,你願意麼?


大家都係男人,男人老狗,玩呢味,好似........?!?!?!
Alessa is a daughter of Dahlia Gillespie. Alessa gets toasted in a ritual. Alessa is in agony. Alessa sends a part of her soul (the pure part, the part that wouldn't have to suffer) away in a form of a baby abandoned on the road. Harry finds the baby with his wife. They name her Cheryl.

The rest of it... You know.
原帖由 抽刀斷水 於 2007-8-8 21:37 發表

我都係想佢為主犧牲一下姐,又唔駛去阿富汗送死丫嘛。



咁又係,你兩位玩成點都好,點都會留返佢條命,唔駛佢死o既。你一向都係咁好心,我欣賞你呢點。
不過,講明先,你唔駛講話[不如預埋你啦]咁樣;因為呢,我呢,我並唔好呢味.........
Alessa is a daughter of Dahlia Gillespie. Alessa gets toasted in a ritual. Alessa is in agony. Alessa sends a part of her soul (the pure part, the part that wouldn't have to suffer) away in a form of a baby abandoned on the road. Harry finds the baby with his wife. They name her Cheryl.

The rest of it... You know.

回復 #19 龍井樹 的帖子

現在有很多很年青的女生當警察,樣貌甜美之餘,也有驕人身材,看來是小說題材的上佳選擇。
Alessa is a daughter of Dahlia Gillespie. Alessa gets toasted in a ritual. Alessa is in agony. Alessa sends a part of her soul (the pure part, the part that wouldn't have to suffer) away in a form of a baby abandoned on the road. Harry finds the baby with his wife. They name her Cheryl.

The rest of it... You know.

回復 #22 龍井樹 的帖子

嗯?怎麼會?這個圖像,只是很普通的卡通圖像吧?怎麼會令你有這種聯想?
Alessa is a daughter of Dahlia Gillespie. Alessa gets toasted in a ritual. Alessa is in agony. Alessa sends a part of her soul (the pure part, the part that wouldn't have to suffer) away in a form of a baby abandoned on the road. Harry finds the baby with his wife. They name her Cheryl.

The rest of it... You know.

回復 #27 龍井樹 的帖子

我比較欣賞佢響[無間道]系列裡面飾演o既角色<李心兒>。呀,多謝你,我呢個圖像[手指指],又真係幾寸咀o既。
Alessa is a daughter of Dahlia Gillespie. Alessa gets toasted in a ritual. Alessa is in agony. Alessa sends a part of her soul (the pure part, the part that wouldn't have to suffer) away in a form of a baby abandoned on the road. Harry finds the baby with his wife. They name her Cheryl.

The rest of it... You know.

回復 #29 龍井樹 的帖子

噢..........寫古仔o者,冇乜特別o既。我又唔鐘意寫鹹古。
Alessa is a daughter of Dahlia Gillespie. Alessa gets toasted in a ritual. Alessa is in agony. Alessa sends a part of her soul (the pure part, the part that wouldn't have to suffer) away in a form of a baby abandoned on the road. Harry finds the baby with his wife. They name her Cheryl.

The rest of it... You know.
原帖由 抽刀斷水 於 2007-8-10 21:11 發表

你個手指指,擺明是hip-hop仔的動作。



哈!唔知你估唔估到,呢個公仔係出自邊度呢?估得到,請你飲杯茶呢!
Alessa is a daughter of Dahlia Gillespie. Alessa gets toasted in a ritual. Alessa is in agony. Alessa sends a part of her soul (the pure part, the part that wouldn't have to suffer) away in a form of a baby abandoned on the road. Harry finds the baby with his wife. They name her Cheryl.

The rest of it... You know.
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